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The wife is getting her panties in a twist because “you never use any of the funny stuff I find for you!”  So here is the first installment of “The Wonderful World of Wife”.  Everyone loves lists right?  Sure they do. 

You know you are a Serb when….

Your mom uses lard instead of Crisco to fry eggs

At your wedding you know only about a third of the people there

At your wedding you have a minimum of 350 guests.

All slave have the same cuisine “supa, sarma, Pecenje”.

All weddings have the same cuisine “supa, sarma, Pecenje”.

All christenings have the cuisine “supa, sarma, Pecenje”.

At least one of your friends name is “Dragan”.

Your father calls you a “dummy” for not knowing how to do something he can’t either.

You drive a nicer car than your parents.

Your Baba calls all cereal “Corn Flakes”.

Your dad claims not to be a racist but insists the whole world should speak Serbian.

Your parents can’t pronounce “Thursday”.

Your parents have gone on vacation ONCE and it was to Yugo.

You don’t want to have or do any business with Serbs.

Your mom tells you not to sit on concrete or your ovaries are going to freeze

Trying to make an H sounds is like clearing your throat. (for you Kum)

If you are female, you first name ends in “A”

You want to fight anyone that says Nikola Tesla didn’t invent electricity

And finally……..

Your mother, brother, sister, aunt, uncle, baba, father insist that “promaja” will kill you

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One thought on “You know you are a Serb when…..

  1. I have to admit your wife has a point. I laughed out loud at this one — even emitted a snort or too.

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