Proving once again that I am on the cutting edge of the worldwide news, I have come across two articles from two separate news sources (both based in Australia for some reason) on the testicle cooking festival in Serbia. The folks in the Serbian tourism offices are trying to carve out their own niche in the tourism world by cookin’ up testicles of all kinds.
For the seventh time the town of Ozrem will host the Testicle Cooking World Championships. On August 27th mostly local cooks will be frying up balls of all kinds. Organizers have had a hard time attracting chefs from outside Serbia, but the locals are girding up their loins to take to the kitchen.
“The importance of a recognisable brand to sell a region cannot be underestimated,” festival organiser Ivo Mokovich said.
“Look at how many people go to Scotland because of the whisky or how many people know Switzerland because of their cheese and chocolate.
“We are now hoping that the many famous and varied dishes that we have created in the region will become world-famous.”
If organizers want this thing to take off I will suggest that they erect some kind of statue in honor of the festival. The more phallic the better. Perhaps one of John Holmes or Ron Jeremy. I admire the locals desire to make a name for themselves on the world scene but a testicle festival? Were all the other good ideas used up already? Is there already a Penis Party? A Mammary Mardi-Gras? Butt Bash? In the interest of full disclosure in a small town near me they hold the Turkey Testicle Festival every fall. I’ve never been but from what I hear they look and taste like chicken nuggets, and it’s quite a booze fest.